THIRD, My Confidence in the Gifts of the SPIRIT —
I feel it coming now
the words I’ve found
are pouring out –
a worn-out time-pressure faucet
rinses my hands to a sputter
asking only that I tap it again
for fresh water
– repeating the process till
all the suds are gone from my skin
and the pages read clean
as the day is long –
like how I imagined when
I first dreamed ~
Women see each other
Once we realize we’ve been taught to judge ourselves against one other
We just stop
Women watch and wait for the signals we send
With our eyes and stances,
Phrasing and pitch and pointed glances
When we glean that things
Are out of step, we step in, up, and forward –
Wardens of our personage
Aren’t you beautiful, love
Who checks to see if I am good before walking on –
Call this something like a song
It’s tough at any age
Like fokes just stopped speaking
Know what I mean –
Like how Pluto’s the ninth planet – Except for it’s not actually
Because factually there’s only eight planets in our Solar System (again)
How we learn(ed) and relearn(ed)
To get back
Turn out surprisingly
Hard to pin down
When it comes time to
After all, y’all do –
When it counts
Ain’t that the truth?
Fear for Queer
Quit finding lines and crests
Betwixt others’ thighs and chests –
Search for the person right off –
Request and recite all given names, honorifics,
I-pronouns, and epithets –
They’re Jack Doe –
Bother to be certain whom and speak to –
Permit eyes to hold gazes –
Realize hunting for sex grazes
And lingers shameless
Leaving traces of baseless assignments and conscripts –
It’s defining defiance of the purpose
For objective terms and phrases –
How might fixed body types and expectations change
The shape of human-being,
Or make shallows of new-thinking?
SECOND, My Authority to Write on Behalf of the Spirit –
And just who might I be, to claim Authority of my own Word?
Truly, one who is instructed by the SPIRIT to do so.
It is the Word of my Testimony which gives me license to write freely,
Because the LORD knows my intents as well as my shortcomings,
And still the SPIRIT enlivens my hands to tell the Whole Truth.
I wonder, as one might who makes a living by writing:
How many drafts did Matthew go through?
And how many scribes might he have employed?
I am no copyist; I am an Author –
A call I have always feared,
For it is the SPIRIT’s own Craft I wield.
I did not understand my role at the start,
But Grace has been a good shepherd through age.
I am not yet wise, though I do actively aim to be kinder;
Because I recognize my Word has power,
I strive to raise chins and meet eyes
So others know I mean them no harm
When my language fails to rise to the *Occasion.
Isn’t it true that I am called to give Testimony?
For what purpose otherwise am I baptized in the WORD?
Some will definitely hear this work and shake their heads,
But then this message isn’t meant for them;
I write because it is the mode the LORD chose,
Bestowed to me with Purpose in mind:
How to describe what it’s like –
Inviting the divine SPIRIT inside –
So my skeptic neighbor who thinks my ‘faith’ or ‘religion’ are well and fine
For me, but believes there’s no Science in it;
The SPIRIT didn’t charge me with convincing others of my Existence,
But said to do good in his NAME and to go tell of it.
I am urged to write by the same SPIRIT who stirs the sermons,
Where many of late have squirmed in their seats
Leaving confused and discomforted.
They are restless with repentance and none the wiser,
Mixed-up with a sense of missed context,
But unable to put their finger on Why.
Right and Wrong are not expository facts,
But become known through resolution:
Plucking Scripture from its place is therefore
As well as tasteless,
Because it robs the audience of the Whole Truth –
A lot of folks don’t know what prompted the SPIRIT to say
‘This, that, and the other’
But rather trust Pastors and Leaders who read the WORD more
To provide meaningful summary and draw conclusions
Rooted in relevant Evidence from the Bible.
I write to remind You of LIVING TRUTH:
Even so withheld in our Versions,
The WORD is Unbound:
I am writing Now.
———–END (Part 2 of 7)———–
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
THIRD, My Confidence in the Gifts of the Spirit –
———–(Soon To Follow)———–
So help me LORD,
I wish to do you Justice in the telling.
Will you please lead my keystrokes
So I might do Just that?
FIRST, My Testimony of the Spirit –
My name is Kailey Ann, and I am Saved.
I am Saved by the Spirit of Jesus,
Who over the course of Three Key Events1.) 2.) 3.)
Made me just as I am.
At age Eleven I ‘Prayed the Prayer’ toward the end of one Sunday Evening Message,
Holding a hardback copy of Order of the Phoenix on my lap.
I said to the LORD, “Please come into my life and make me more like you,”
But I didn’t look up when Pastor Eddy asked me to –
I was afraid – even though I thought I prayed the prayer right,
I didn’t wanna admit how many times I’d prayed it already in my life –
Always wondering whether it counted if
I doubted right away
Or if I kept asking for Proof.
I was Baptized in 2006 right after my little sister –
We got dunked in the Name of the FATHER, SON, and HOLY SPIRIT by Pastor Marion,
Who’d performed my parents’ wedding ceremony that very same school year.
I was wearing a maroon gown which could’of fit three of me,
And a silver cross necklace my Mom put around my neck that morning,
And my hair was in a ponytail because it always was –
I tried not to feel shame about the fact that I was older,
And my little sister was getting dunked first –
My parents said being Baptized was my choice,
And I’d said, “If she’s ready, I am!”
Because I Twelve and not ‘Out’
And I could not bear the secrecy
Of seeming Unsure whether I was Saved
In July of 2008, It Happened:
I spent the summer saving money so I could go to Supercamperific,
And my Mom spotted me half the funding I needed to go because
She loves me, and Thirteen isn’t old enough to make minimum wage.
At the tail-end of Pastor Terry’s first Evening Message, he explained:
“Salvation is a Gift: All you have to do is take it.”
And then, Out of Nowhere –
Terry Foster called My Name:
“Kailey, would you come up here for a minute?”
The Camp Nawakwa amphitheater
At McCormick’s Creek was abuzz –
I stood in front a great sum of campers,
Joined my church camp pastor center-stage,
And he held out his hand:
And I saw –
In his upturned palm:
A face – Sakakawea smiling:
Her eyes flashed:
And Terry said to Me so All could hear:
“It’s a Gift: All you have to do is take it.”
So I did * I have this token of Wisdom with me always, wherever I go.
———–END (Part 1 of 7)———–
SECOND, My Authority to Write on Behalf of the Spirit –
———–(Soon To Follow)———–
Addressing one Churchᵃ
leader’s claim to relentless
pursuit of Jesus…
implies discourse, back-and-forth
or else it’s just Pride.
If queerness is wrong,
what on earth did Jesus mean –
Is it not true that
He makes us two-spirited
Consider the Source,
for the LORD does not look well
on WORD taught in vain;
It is not I who
rebukes you but our Savior
who demands better;
Instead of stripping
Scripture of context, try this:
Search in earnestness.
Where does my God say
Church has a right to know my
A Genderqueer Member, baptized
’05 in Greenwood
ᵃ – Emmanuel Church | https://www.eclife.org/
ᵇ – “Conversation # 2 | Conversations | Pastor Danny Anderson | Emmanuel Church Online Message.” Emmanuel Church, 15 Mar. 2022, https://youtu.be/yYp6CqEIe70. Accessed 24 Mar. 2022.
This video should include a trigger warning for audience members in the LGBTQ community. Its message includes a discussion of ‘transgenderism’ as defined by the Head Paster of Emmanuel Church, whose definition and expounding message fundamentally misrepresents and misinterprets the spiritual, cultural, experiential, and philosophical facts of trans and nonbinary genders. The message argues that (1) Gender and biology are inseparably linked; (2) Gender cannot be assigned and is biological fact; (3) There is purpose and order in binary gender.
The message argues that individuals should, “Let your biology determine your gender identity,” citing the following as scripture evidence supporting the ‘moral law’ of binary gender:
- The Bible (ESV)
- Proverbs 3:5-6
- Luke 9:23, Genesis 1:27-28
- Matthew 19, Genesis 2:24
- Deuteronomy 22:5
- Psalm 139:14
“Is [ fill-in-the-blank ] wrong?”
Queries such as these ^
are self-fulfilling prophesies:
When answer given comes across prescriptive,
it may’of been the question was begging;
First instead as open-ended,
then let the heart and mind discern in searching.
Thirty miles off
I saw the Parkway smoke-trails
Noting the headwind
A #haiku @bykaileyann